by Emma Bush 2015

Once I was nothing more than a drop of rain
up high in the sky
yet to feel the pain of change…
just a drop dripping and
falling down
towards that impressive ground,
down below
where I watched all the other raindrops go.
Perhaps I don’t know as much as I think I do though,
because when a cold front moved in then
I’m snow! Now float like a parachute
I did spins in the air as I came down,
and whimsical loopty-loops.
I took my time.
I’m acutely aware there is no rewind.
While I was drifting
the wind kept on lifting me!
I decided to dream of the life
I wanted to live.
So many things
I wanted to do and be,
and so many things my eyes have wanted to see,
and as I was coming down
to that ever intimidating ground
I could SEE
what it was and how it was gonna be!
But I didn’t land as I planned,
sometimes fate plays a hand.
Fast  was my crash,
so quiet-not loud,
landing in snow
was like landing in clouds.
But now I fear trouble creeps
cause nothing is going to be able to keep me
from rolling down this hill….
on a precipice so high
over looking shining lights
and in the distance is the sea
at this very instance,
this incline is so steep!
Redefining the word free fall.
Down down down-
that was my head
and that was my heals,
over and over down that hill I cartwheeled.
The more I tumbled
the less I could feel.
All that I was aware of was my size
as at this point I’m afraid
 I may hurt or compromise
something or someone else
I don’t wish to hurt anyone’s pride.
As this has been happening
I snagged my toe on a ball of string.
Dear me!  Oh my!
I find inside my snowball string,
So in your lie I’m now lying,
doesn’t seem fair
this doesn’t seem like living,
it’s dying.
As my twirling world is spiraling
and I’m somersaulting
down this thing
I’m just getting more tied and knotted up in this ball of string!
I was spending all my time hoping to break my fall,
it turns out I’ve got so much string and snowball
as I get closer to the city
beneath me
i can more clearly see
that when this snowball finally
comes to a stop and gets some rest
It’s going to be one big
huge gigantic slushy
 snowball mess
and it may leave many feeling regret or duress.
Because you can’t have a snowball
string of lies without causing pain on arrival.
We should all compromise and call it survival.

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