27. You Don’t Know

 

“Sex became really messed up for you.”  He said to me.  “That’s too bad.”

“It did get messed up for me.”  I agreed.

“That’s too bad you let that happen.”

“Excuse me?”  –

“It’s too bad you let that get screwed up for you.”  He corrected.

“Are you KIDDING?”  I said.  “DO YOU REMEMBER?  Do YOU REMEMBER HOW IT GOT FUCKED UP?  Don’t you remember how it started?  When YOU STARTED TREATING ME MORE LIKE A THING THAN A HUMAN?  Do you remember my tears, begging you to stop, trying to get away?  Do you remember ripping my clothes off my body while I tried to keep them on?  DO YOU REALIZED WHEN AND HOW MY SEX WAS BROKEN?  You were supposed to be my partner, care for me and love me, not own me.”

He looked at me and smiled slyly, shaking his head, AND THEN HE WINKED AT ME. “That specifically, no …NO RECOLLECTION.  But I’m a man…if I want it I’m going to take it…so…it’s believable.”

I DO NOT CARE WHAT YOU THINK YOU KNOW….

Let me tell you what I KNOW.  Once upon a time I was a little girl, with dreams of love…and respect…sex was supposed to be something that accented the love in a relationship.  IT WAS NEVER MEANT TO DIAGNOSE WHO HAS THE CONTROL…. LOVE is supposed to be a team effort…not a display of who has ownership.  Ever.

If someone is EXERTING THEIR SEX ON YOU and ABUSING YOURS as a form of CONTROL, you are in a domestically violent companionship…pray for freedom.  IT WILL NOT COME TO YOU, YOU HAVE TO SEEK IT OUT, GET PROFESSIONAL HELP….Takes work and a lot of time…but YOU ARE WORTH IT.

We all deserve FREEDOM.

 

 

 

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